The Effects of Divorce on Your Children

Divorce is hard on the entire family. It is just as tough, if not more so, for a child to go through a divorce than it is for you or your spouse. The separation of their parents can have a lasting result on not only their emotions, but on their personalities. If you are overly sensitive about what your spouse says or does with your child, then your child will learn to use your spouse to pit you against one another. “Mom told me I could do this” “Dad told me I couldn’t say that”. It not only teaches the child to be manipulative, but it also makes your relationship with your ex so much harder. There greene scholarship columbia must be open communication between the two parents. As much as you may resent each other, you need to remain civil in front of your children and when it comes to their well being. There should be no fighting over who takes your son to his first day of kindergarten. There is no reason you can’t both be there. You’re adults and if you’re old enough to be married and get a divorce, you’re old enough to behave yourselves in front of your children. It is important for not only their well being, but for yours as well. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life having petty arguments with your ex.
Shielding your Kids importance of public interest lawyering from your Divorce
Shielding your children from divorce does not mean covering up your feelings and hiding the reasons for the separation. That will only make things worse for your kids. It means to shield them from the effects the divorce can have on them. Talking to your children about your divorce is monumentally important to their emotional well-being. No matter how careful you are, divorce will have a life-long effect on your babies. Talking to them about it, as uncomfortable as it may be, will allow them to grow up without being afraid to fall in love and get married themselves. Children with divorced parents are often afraid of marriage and divorce and even having kids of their own because they have already experienced the profound effect of family separation on their life and the lives of those they love. They will even blame themselves for you getting the divorce. That is another reason it is so completely important to talk to them. Make sure they know without a doubt that the divorce was between you and your spouse and that they had nothing to do with it. Ensure that they’re aware that you both love them very much and that will never change.
Keep Up Appearances for your Babies’ Sake
It is also important to never put your spouse down in front of the kids. No matter what s/he has done to you or said about you, their image means the world to your child. Just as your does. Talking bad about your spouse will only cause your children to have to pick sides. No child should ever have to choose between their mother and father. Even if your spouse cheated on you and you did nothing wrong, take equal blame. “Mommy and Daddy made some mistakes and we hurt each other’s feelings” is a much better way to tell your child why you’re getting a divorce. That way the child can understand that grownups make mistakes too and they won’t have to feel like they’re betraying one of you to still love the other. If they want to know the whole story once they’re adults, it’s fine to tell them then, but again, tell it as objectively as possible. You can still be a happy family even if you live in two places instead of one.
Divorce is not easy and it’s not fun, but If it’s the choice you and/or your spouse has made, you need to make sure you go about it the right way to save your children a lot of mental and emotional damage. Treat your spouse with respect in front of the children, no matter how you’re feeling inside and talk with your kids and let them know that you’re both at fault and you both still love them. Your children are the most important things in your life once your spouse is gone. Don’t cause resentment and hurt feelings, love them the way they deserve to be loved.

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